God is in Control

August 14, 2014

My husband has Non-Alcoholic Cirrhosis. His has never even drank a beer before. He has never tried drugs. He wouldn't take a tylonol unless he was desperate. If fact, up until about five years ago, he had never been sick- not even a cold.

It started out when he lost over 100 pounds in less than three months. He was diagnosed with diabetes. The funny thing is, he had no problem giving up the sweets, and he immediately switched to diet Pepsi without complaint. He still won't eat vegetables through! Then two years ago in October, he was diagnosed with stage 4 cirrhosis. I was devastated. I grieved for almost a year as if he were already gone. The transplant specialist said it was caused by the rapid weightloss. It is the third leading cause, but it is still such a small percentage compared to alcoholism that most people have never heard of it.

God has used his illness to teach and mold me in so many ways. He gave me the desire to start writing about a year and a half ago, and that has made a big difference for me. It has giving me a release and a way of escape for me. It has giving me joy and a calling.  

One of the things I have learned is that I can't do it all myself. I am the oldest in my family, and everyone including my parents have always depended on me. I have always felt up for the challenge. Not anymore, but that is okay. I used to think 'I've got this'. I don't anymore. God is in control.

 

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